Looking and Seeing

As an adult I have always enjoyed taking photos, mostly of my children, family events, then my grandchildren.  It wasn't until we began going to Colorado for my husband's hunting trips that I really started "seeing" what was out there in the big world.  I can remember my first look at the Rockies as we drove up that steep hill leaving Denver heading west, going around a curve and POW..there were those high peaks still capped with some snow in July, stabbing up toward that blue sky!   Using a film camera and shooting through the front windshield to freeze that view for oohing and aahing later.  Who knew that would be the start of countless "drive-by shootings" that only increased with the digital age.  

Somewhere deep in my heart and mind was the capturing of light, lines, shapes, curves, colors, textures and all the other photographic qualities that drew me in..but I didn't know it at the time.  So many years have passed and now when I look back at my photos that are lodging in my computer, I can see that my eye and heart were seeking out those essences even without me knowing until I found a name for the type of photography that I was drawn into- contemplative!   Being contemplative and looking close..seeing the flower first but looking further to its essence..

 standing inside a tree leaves instead of taking a picture from outside of the whole tree,

 soft flowers with spiny protectors instead of just the pretty flower,

  shadows of a dead plant on the sand where most people would not even notice. 

This is what my photography is all about now.  A personal connection with the world. It gives me joy and a connection to life around me.   I feel grateful and awed that my eyes are seeing remarkable things in the everyday world where I live.  I saw this leaf in a friend's flower bed and she asked "Why are taking a photo of that dead leaf?"  I responded "  Look at the life lines all connected together and it looks like lace to me!"  She responded " I would never have seen that, it is just a dead leaf but now that you say that I can see the lines."   But she never saw the beauty or the life connection.   She doesn't know what she is missing!

Keep looking and really "See"!  Every thing is amazing!

What if?

A friend has been encouraging me to start selling my photos online or locally.  I have thought and thought about doing this but something keeps holding me back from making that effort. I think the something is me, myself and I.   Am I good enough? Do I have a sufficient portfolio of photos that would be appealing to those that may want to buy?  I have 10,000's of photos! Some are pretty good; my mind says they might not be good enough.    Making a genuine portfolio of all my "best" work is a time consuming project.   How to choose..what kind of photo..are they good enough?   I don't over process my photos and I don't shoot in "raw".  I don't know what a slider is in Photoshop or Lightroom.  Does this make my photos different and am I missing out on high quality colors and sharpness because I don't want to change my photo from what I actually saw.

Lots to ponder.  My word for this year was accomplish. I have accomplished some things that were important to me..not big things..just little tweaks to make me a better photographer at the push of the shutter button.    Maybe I need to get that portfolio made so that I can "accomplish" something like selling prints.  It will be the first step in the process.  Making that first step is overcoming the most fear. I might end up with a nice portfolio to share on a website.  Or make my own website and blog.

Either way, take the first step.  Taking photos and sharing what I see..all the beauty, ugliness, colors, light, textures and everything else that makes me get that camera to my eye is what it is all about to me.  I can play around in the little free post processing software to make a flower a little special.

I changed this background and made it look different from the original..but it still has the same emotional connection for me that it did when I snapped it.   If a friend feels an emotion connection to a photo I have taken and wants a print, I will do that at no cost to them as that is just how I am.    Accepting payment for a print would probably make me feel that I am beyond amateur photographer which is a goal I may have to push to the top of my list to accomplish this year.

Me, myself and I have to take that first step.